Why conflict is healthy for relationships?


Plates fly in all directions, the roast is overcooked and anyway, it is no longer a question of eating for the moment. Alerted by the shouting, the neighbors listened behind the door to find out who would have the last word.

In short, another argument. Sometimes the words spoken and heard during these verbal games make us doubt our love or even our couple only. That’s true: why prolong an explosive relationship when it’s easier to have a sex friend?

Only, let’s not go too fast; the arguments do not always mean that everything is to throw. Let’s discover the three advantages of the conflicts between lovers:

The disputes make us wiser

Do not be fooled; avoid arguments in a couple is mission impossible. And for a good reason! The budget to manage, the duties of children, chores that never end. It is easy to lose your temper in the whirlwind of everyday life quickly. And when that’s the case, the objections fuse: “I always do everything here! Since when did not you clean the bathroom? Or again: “I only asked you for one thing, and you forgot it! “.

However, it is a proven fact by the WHO: 80% of the couples are in crisis. But love stories do not always end badly by a fatality; they end badly because the pair is not ready to argue. Indeed, society conveys the image of a simple life without addiction or even a word higher than the other.

Therefore, at the slightest hitch, nobody wants to go back on the saddle. The disputes make us realize this reality, and once the shock passed, we grow suddenly realizing that we had, often, unrealistic expectations. Do not try to convince the other; you are both right; find a win-win compromise where everyone is there!

To argue is to discover each other under another angle

When a conflict breaks out, there is a reason. Take a look at it, and you will often discover what your sensitivities and flaws are to both of you. The arguments make it possible to affirm us (and not only in a sound way). As a couple, we tend to see our companion as a kind of mirror where the differences are strikingly apparent to us. To count this difference, even if it is not easy when one sends us all our faults in the head.

Conflict: the opposite of indifference

couple at home

Because contrary to popular belief, the opposite of love is not hatred but indifference. Studies show that couples who do not quarrel end up no longer maintain intimacy and become mere “roommates.” And yes, this is the most critical point, the thing to never forget: when we argue is that the subject is essential to us.

What’s more reassuring than knowing that the other inquiries as much as we do about the situation and happiness in the couple? After all, if we argue it is to reconcile better!

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